The Best Damn Super Bowl Recipes From a Guy Who's Never Watched the Super Bowl
Just because I don't watch it doesn't mean I don't know how to eat as if I do.
THE SPORTS BOWL THINGAMAJIG IS THIS SUNDAY. (Go, Celtics!) As most of you know, I live for the half-time shows, not football (quelle surprise), but, alas, man cannot live by sparkles, spangles, and fireworks alone. Just ask Neely.
So, in honor of those of you who will watch and eat (and eat and eat!), here’s a little rundown of what to do in the kitchen. (You’re on your own in the TV room.)
Super Bowl Sunday isn’t cooking; it’s crowd management. It’s about making food that tastes great an hour later, survives the occasional ref call meltdown, and doesn’t require a fork or an apology. Nobody needs your culinary ego today—they need fuel. Crispy, melty, salty fuel.
So this year, ditch the fantasy of precious gourmet sliders and artisanal dips that require garnish by tweezer. You’re not auditioning for Top Chef. You’re hosting the culinary equivalent of a contact sport. Get the food out, keep the crowd happy, and don’t miss the halftime show because you’re scrubbing a baking sheet.
Chow,
Sports Bowl Survival Strategy
Pick plays that last. Chili, wings, nachos—foods that only get better as the tension rises.
Create snack zones. One near the TV, one by the drinks. Keeps people moving and minimizes chip casualties.
Keep it one-handed. No forks. No knives. Just grab, chew, and cheer.
Prep drinks in bulk. Pitchers, not cocktails. You deserve to watch the commercials too.
End strong, end easy. Brownies, cookies, maybe hand pies. Desserts that don’t need fanfare—just napkins.
Quick Links
The Recipes
Football Cheese Ball
This football cheese ball with bacon is, well, exactly what the title proclaims. A cheese ball in the shape of a football. Made with both Cheddar and cream cheese as well as jalapeño and, yes, bacon. Perfect for Super Bowl.
Pressure Cooker Ribs
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 4.79 from 66 votes
These pressure cooker ribs, which are easy and ideal for the Instant Pot, are finished in the oven with a brown sugar and Dijon glaze. It’s a super-fast method for knee-wobbling, lip-smacking, fall-off-the-bone tenderness.
Choriqueso
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 4.93 from 14 votes
Choriqueso is a Mexican cheese dip topped with cooked chorizo sausage and a sprinkling of cilantro that is served with chips or warm tortillas. Makes a swell appetizer or even a meal unto itself.
Chorizo Meatballs
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 4.86 from 27 votes
The One and I re-test-drove these little lovelies this past weekend. I forgot how good they were! They’re simple to make with ground beef and Spanish pork chorizo, Cheddar cheese, red onion, cilantro, chili powder, cumin, and oregano. Honestly, some of the best meatballs we’ve ever made.
Cajun Fried Chicken
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 4.64 from 11 votes
This Cajun fried chicken recipe is bathed in buttermilk and turns out crisp, slightly spicy, perfectly deep-fried loveliness thanks to its Southern charm and Louisiana personality. Quite literally the best we’ve had.
Tabasco Chicken Wings
These Tabasco chicken wings, which are deep-fried and tossed in a spicy Tabasco butter sauce made with chili sauce, vinegar, and cayenne, are not your ordinary chicken wings.
Hot Artichoke Dip
Artichoke hearts are an essential store-cupboard ingredient for me. This recipe is one of my favorites—delicious, quick, and simple to make. I always serve this with toasted rosemary focaccia. It is rich, comforting, and everyone always wants the recipe.
Crab Cakes With Ritz Crackers
Granted, crab cakes aren’t exactly at the top of Super Bowl Food Lists, but come on, cut me some slack! I need to inject a LITTLE zhuzh in this newsletter!
These cakes are a lush take on doughy crab cakes of days past. These crab cakes are mostly crab—as they should be—with some celery, heavy cream, and seasoning. It's true! The Ritz crackers make a crunchy, buttery crust for the luscious little cakes. Finish it all off with a buttery lemon and white wine sauce.
Pepperoni Pan Pizza
This pepperoni pan pizza is made with a simple yet superlative from-scratch tomato sauce, two types of mozzarella, Parmesan cheese, pepperoni, and either store-bought or homemade dough. Lavished with everyone’s favorite topping and three types of cheese, this thick-crusted beauty means you can delete your closest pizza delivery place from your contacts and forget you ever craved anything else.
Short Rib Chili
This short rib chili is made with tender braised short ribs. No beans allowed...but you won’t miss them at all, I promise.
Puerto Rican-Style Ropa Vieja
This Puerto Rican-style ropa vieja is made by slowly braising beef chuck roast in a fragrant sauce of onions, peppers, tomatoes, olives, and raisins until meltingly tender.
Smoked Mac and Cheese
Smoked mac and cheese takes one of the best barbecue sides and adds it to the grill. Imbued with a touch of smoke, the three types of cheese and creamy sauce take on a whole new level of lusciousness.
Small Batch Brownies
These brownies are made from scratch and baked in a loaf pan, which means they make just enough for two, so you don’t have an entire baking pan of brownies sitting around all week tempting you. You’re welcome.
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This hit a home-run with me. Or a touchdown. Or something. I’ve actually hosted several Super Bowl Sunday parties, rarely having the foggiest idea which teams were playing. But food like this is always a winner—any day of the week. Party on!
I have been following you for a long time. Many many years ago I was a recipe tester for you. That was so much fun and my family loved when they got to eat the results. I am a huge fan of yours!